Persistence to Succeed: A Tribute to my Wife

I have written several posts about our Hispanic culture describing some our general characteristics. For the most part I have stayed away from writing negative generalities, even though they are important to acknowledge because they can help us grow and learn. An area that people often crave to hear about is about Hispanics that succeed in their lives. For the most part we look for them in our general popular culture, in politics or in business. This is all good. But we often overlook those that are around us that have achieved success in their lives. This success is not measured by the amount of digits the person earns in his or her career, but by the effort, persistence and hurdles they have had to overcome to achieve their goals for their lives. I have one close to me. My wife. Here is a brief tribute to her as woman who has persisted to be where she is now. I know there are many others out there that serve as role models for our Hispanic culture but here is my favorite, the one and only love of my life.

Patricia was born in San Gregorio, Michoacán México to a large family of eight, four boys and four girls. She was the second born. Her name was given by her dad who probably took the name from the fact that she was born in March, and decided to name her after St. Patrick. She might dispute this but I will go ahead and leave it here. I have described what life was for her mom Espi, who is one of my heroes and hers as well, in another post so I won’t go in too much detail here. She was virtually a single parent who raised eight children with very few means.  Her family was poor, often lacked food to eat, clothing to wear or blankets to sleep (this would be considered far below poverty here in the United States).  My wife tells me how even though her mom was illiterate she would sit them at the table to do homework. She pretended she knew what they were doing when in fact she didn’t. But this fostered in them the idea that they needed to be educated. They all learned good manners, went to school, and almost all learned a profession.

My wife wanted to be a flight attendant but this choice wasn’t given to her by her mom, partly because she did  not want her to go far away (a typical Hispanic parent apprehension). She had two choices that were available in her town en La Barca, Jalisco. One of them was being an administrative assistant or secretary. The other one was a nurse. She chose the latter.
As a second born, my wife was the de facto first-born assuming the responsibility of being her mom’s secretary and assistant. She went on errands from an early age, wrote and read letters for her and was considered the favorite (I hope her siblings don’t read this) and is to this date. By the age of 13 my wife was already working assisting in a hospital. Her first experience in the operating room where she was told to hold a man’s amputated leg. She remembers vividly and recounts the feeling of holding the leg and almost tossing it.

Patricia went on to finish “Preparatoria” (which is the equivalent of High School or grades 10-12th) ranking second in her class and then went on to nursing school.  This took three years plus a year in internship. She was top of her class getting the best grades. One of her classmates who was a top student was jealous of her because she was able to get good grades without spending too much time studying. Her strategy was simple she says, “I would pay attention in class without any distractions.” She did this and got the best grades graduating first in her class. After finishing her classwork she went on to do her internship. This was the first time she got to go out and live out of her town, la Barca Jalisco.

After finishing her nursing program, she was convinced that she needed to come to America where she was told the lie that “money was found on the streets”. This was an opportunity to go work and help her mom. Her plan was to come and earn money to buy her a home. In her early 20’s she left her town and came to America. She arrived in Santa Ana California to live with some relatives. It was hard for her to get a job with no English but she did. She found a job in a plastic factory where she worked for a few months and then moved to another one that made mini blinds. Her interview for this last one was all in English and she remembers saying “yes” to almost all the questions including the one about working the evening shift. During the day she went to ESL classes to learn English and eventually earned her GED after two years. In about two years she was able to be fluent enough to have a conversation in English. Simultaneously, she took a course in medical assistant.

She loves her mom!

After getting her medical assistant course done, a doctor with whom she did her practice hired her as a medical assistant. She recalls how nervous she was when she had to answer the phones in English at the clinic. She persisted and earned a good reputation from the doctor, coworkers and patients. Working as a medical assistant was not enough for her. She was a nurse and wanted to be a nurse. She went on and investigated how she could transfer her degree to America and began doing the paperwork. This involved having her school documents translated and certified. Her goal was also to help her family. Through this time she helped her mom come to America as well as many of her siblings becoming their head of household.

After doing all this she had to take her exam to be certified as a registered nurse. It was around this time when I met her at church. She had just become a Christian. She had taken the test twice and had not passed it. She was growing discouraged. The problem she had was the difficulty of understanding the material presented all in English. It was at this point that her mom pleaded with her and asked her to take it one more time. “Do it for me,” she said. This paid off. She received her Registered Nurse license.

During this time we were dating. When we married she went on to work as a nurse.  Her work trajectory that followed after this was all upward due to her hard work ethic to be excellent in everything she did. She liked working in outpatient surgeries due to the hours and moved around jobs every three years or so, primarily because she was recruited by employers who heard about her. At her last job in California she was getting top pay but it was around this time that we decided to move out of state. At this point she decided it was time to stay home but even in our new home location she was sought after as a nurse. She still volunteers for a community clinic, goes on a yearly medical mission trip and once again, her work ethic, care for people and patients distinguishes her.

My wife, the nurse, is of course much more than a nurse. She is a caring, loving mom of four children and one grandchild, beloved pastor’s wife, loving daughter with a servant’s heart for people and for the Lord. Her life is an example of persistence to succeed even when you have little to look forward and make things happen. With focus, determination, hard work ethic, a desire to help and serve others and to follow God’s will it is possible to succeed. The fruit of her labor can be seen in her two grown children, one a pastry chef and another one finishing up his Masters degree at MIT. She also has two more children growing up whom she has instilled her values. I am grateful for her because I am where I am now, in large part because of her example. She pushed me to pursue my undergraduate work and supported me during my career path. She has been the foremost cheerleader in all that I have done.

On behalf of all of those whom you’ve touched in many ways, thank you my dear wife, friend and lover.

Caring for a patient on a medical mission trip to Perú

Enjoying a laugh with an indigenous lady on a medical mission trip to Oaxaca in 2017

Giving hugs is part of her (as well as a greeting kiss)